This is my family's vacation mode, before teens:
I do the research, plan an itinerary of activities, everyone gets in the car and goes to said activity, we take some photos, and we're done.
This is my family's vacation mode, after teens:
I do the research, plan an itinerary of activities, there are 1000 complaints before we get in the car and go to the said activity, we take some photos, but someone looks grumpy in the photos because they didn't want to be there, we return to the hotel room, and someone is still complaining. PS. Everyone is looking down at a device on the ride home.
A couple of summers ago, I planned a family trip. It was the first trip with three full-fledged teenagers, and I was not prepared. Opinions and attitudes attempted to derail the trip and all of the planning involved (not to mention the expense). I was able to salvage that particular trip, but I learned a few lessons along the way. Here are some things to consider when planning your next trip with your tweens and teens.
- Include them in the planning. Gather their ideas in the planning stages - ideal destinations, desired activities, etc. If they are a part of the planning process from the start, they are less apt to complain. Trust me on this.
- Relax your expectations and your itinerary. Everyone pictures an ideal trip with an itinerary and Instagram-worthy photos of family bonding, laughs, and a good time had by all. But the reality is that the best-laid plans often go awry. Allow some space in your itinerary for hiccups. They happen.
- Allow some time for separation. If you are set on going to a museum, but your teen just doesn't want to go, allow him the freedom to opt-out and stay in the hotel room for a bit. Likewise, if you have multiple children, don't force everyone to go to every single activity. Some things are just not as interesting to some people. That being said...
- Keep some mandatory together-time on the schedule. After all, it is a family vacation. Insist that everyone participates in activities are expensive or difficult to obtain, once-in-a-lifetime, unique to that area, or iconic (yes, son, we're all going to see the Statue of Liberty).
- Relax about electronics, but do set limits. Relax - there will be selfies and Snapchat. But, don't' let the phone consume the vacation. Establish some times when phones will be put away.
- Have fun. Relax the expectation of making grand memories, and simply enjoy your time together. Relax the rules a bit. Let them venture out (as you are comfortable). And enjoy!
